Parenting Clips

I almost gave up on breastfeeding. Now I’m nursing my toddler.

Breastfeeding

I considered giving up on breastfeeding when my son was just 24 hours old. I had been trying to feed him for hours, but my little preterm 36-weeker was struggling. If I got him to latch, a difficult feat in its own right, he drank for only a minute or so before falling asleep. When I tried to wake him, he’d only cry.                                                                       

It made me feel like a bad mom when I failed to get him to latch, and it made me feel like a bad person to make him cry. 

Eventually we found success, and now, because of the COVID-19 pandemic, it’s been over a year and I’m still nursing my son. Without even making the explicit decision to do so, I somehow found myself practicing extended breastfeeding with a soon-to-be 14-month-old—something only a little over a third of American parents do today. 

I Had a C-Section and It’s Taken Me a Long Time to Stop Being Angry About It

Pregnancy

The minute that my doctor told me I needed to have a cesarean section, I started to cry.

I generally consider myself to be pretty brave, but when I was told that I needed major surgery to give birth to my son, I was not brave — I was terrified.

I should have had a bunch of questions, but the only word I managed to choke out was “Really?”

People Say a Lot of Terrible Things to New Parents. Here’s How to Cope

Parenthood

I was standing in a checkout line in a nearly empty Target with my 2-week old baby when the lady behind me noticed him. She smiled at him, then looked up at me, her expression hardening: “He’s a fresh one. Isn’t he a little young to be out in public?”

Flustered, I shrugged and turned back to unpacking my cart full of diapers, wipes, and other baby essentials I’d come in to buy. I was very careful to avoid eye contact with her again.

It was only later, as I recounted the story to my husband, that I thought of a bunch of responses I wish I’d given her. I worried that by turning away from her, I’d let her win.

Yes, New Moms Need to Give Consent During Childbirth

Childbirth

I’d recently given birth to my son via C-section when, as I was trying to change pads, a nurse entered the bathroom. Instinctively, I tried to cover myself up.

“Oh come on,” the nurse said. “We’ve seen it all before.”

She wasn’t wrong. Lots of people had seen me naked that day. I’d lain exposed on a hospital bed while that nurse saw my doctor do a pelvic exam. I’d been wheeled into an operating room and sliced open by my doctor in front of an anesthesiologist, a neonatologist, a nurse, and a medical student. Then, a nurse had helped me learn to breastfeed my newborn — a process that involved being topless and being repeatedly touched.

Yet, in that bathroom on that day, it didn’t matter that she’d seen my body before. I wanted some privacy and I had the right to ask for it.

How to Use Coconut Oil to Clear Up Your Baby’s Cradle Cap

Baby Care

Just as you settle into your daily routine with your adorable newborn, you might notice some crusty, yellow or white, scale-like patches on their scalp. These patches might be underneath their hair, behind their ears, on their forehead, in skin folds, or even in their eyebrows.

But if you see it, don’t panic. Your baby didn’t get this from you not bathing them enough, or from anything else you think you did wrong.

It’s probably just a case of cradle cap. While harmless, it’s annoying. Here’s how coconut oil may help.

Arguing in Front of Your Kids Happens: Here’s How to Keep It Healthy

Parenting

Late one evening, my husband and I were arguing when I noticed our 6-month-old son. He’d been playing with his toys on the bed, but now he’d stopped. Instead, he was sitting, a toy laying lifeless in his lap, as he stared at his hands. He looked sad.

The sight broke my heart.

I rushed over and picked him up, giving him a reassuring hug. My husband joined me. We both stopped arguing for the rest of the night, choosing instead to focus on comforting our son.

But it was hard for both of us to shake the image of our crestfallen son.

We knew he was too young to understand any of the things we were yelling at each other about, but it was still clear that we were affecting him with our tone, our raised voices, and our angry faces.

Our son soon forgave us and went back to playing with his favorite toy, but the incident left both of us wondering whether our argument — and any others we might have — could affect him in the long term.

How Challenging My Own Fatphobia Will Make Me a Better Parent to My Son

Body Image

When I was about 5 years old, I was sitting at a restaurant when I looked over at my mom and said “Mommy, when I’m older, I want to look just like you.” 

“Oh no,” she replied quickly. “You don’t want to have a tummy like mine.”

This wasn’t the first time I heard my parents speak about their own bodies in a negative way. 

My family was also prone to commenting on other people’s bodies too. Family reunions and large get-togethers always involved updates on who had put on weight and who had lost weight. Those who had lost pounds got compliments.

As I grew up, this commentary on body size turned toward me.

WHY I ALMOST GAVE UP ON BREASTFEEDING 2 DAYS AFTER MY SON WAS BORN

Breastfeeding

One interaction nearly ended my breastfeeding journey. I found my way back, but it shouldn’t have been that way.

It was 2 a.m., and I was struggling to nurse my not-even-48-hour-old son. I was exhausted because I hadn’t slept more than a couple hours in a row since he’d arrived.

My cesarean incision was throbbing. And my new baby wouldn’t latch for more than a minute or two. When he did, it hurt a lot. He also kept falling back asleep. When I’d wake him, he’d cry, which only made me to do the same.

So I rang for a nurse.

I told her how long we’d been trying but that in all that time, he’d only actually nursed for 5 to 7 minutes total. Gesturing to my sleeping newborn, I said that he seemed more interested in snoozing.

I asked if we might try again after both of us had napped a little. I was worried that I’d fall asleep feeding him and accidentally drop or suffocate him.

But instead of helping me, she simply said “No.”

Is It Safe to Use Lube During Pregnancy?

Pregnancy

Sex when you’re pregnant can be a great thing (as long as your doctor hasn’t told you not to, that is).

Not only does sex help you and your partner connect, but it can also do good things for your well-being, like lower your stress and release oxytocin (a feel-good hormone that eases pain and boosts your mood and your baby’s).

Plus, research suggests sex might even improve your chances of a healthy pregnancy, and reduce your chances of preeclampsia.

Of course, sex during pregnancy isn’t without its challenges: Morning sickness might keep sex off the table during the first trimester. And later, you’ve got other symptoms, like heartburn, back pain, a growing bump, and the increased weight of your uterus on your pelvis that can make finding a comfortable position difficult.

On top of that, some people have to deal with vaginal dryness, which can make intercourse painful.

That said, lots of people have increased libido when they’re pregnant. And the good news is, lube can help make things go smoothly.

Are Yoni Pearls Safe During Pregnancy?

Pregnancy

If you’re pregnant, you’re probably very aware that your vagina is about to go through a lot very soon.

That’s why some people become interested in natural remedies and detoxes, like yoni pearls, to help prepare or cleanse their vagina before delivery. But are yoni pearls safe? And can they cause miscarriages?

We’ll give you the bottom line first: There are no documented cases of yoni pearls causing miscarriage, but it’s possible due to the risks associated with using them.

We’re here to answer all your questions.

The Naked Truth

Personal Essay

About 12 hours after I’d given birth to my son via C-section, I was trying to change pads when a nurse entered the bathroom without knocking. I immediately tried to cover myself up.

“Oh, don’t worry,” she said. “We’ve seen it all before.”

I didn’t find her answer comforting. Lots of people had seen me naked recently, and I found their casual demeanor about it unsettling. 

Letting so many people see my body was the one part of becoming a mother that I hadn’t really expected and it overwhelmed me. I had planned to share my body with my baby, not the rest of the world. 

How Loving My Son Unconditionally Taught Me To Love Myself, Too

Sponsored

Barely 24 hours after giving birth to my son, I was pretty sure I’d never walk again. The on-call doctor had ordered me to take multiple laps around the maternity ward, but after just one, I was nauseous, dizzy and my C-section incision was throbbing. Fighting back tears, I’d crawled back into my hospital bed and decided I didn’t care what he said. I was not getting up again today.

But then — while my husband was down in the cafeteria grabbing coffee and the nurse was tending to another patient down the hall — my newborn awoke from his nap and started to cry, alerting me to a dirty diaper. I couldn’t let him cry or be uncomfortable until someone was free to help bring him to me. Without thinking twice about the pain, I dragged myself out of bed…

When to Introduce Walnuts, Almonds, and Other Nuts to Baby

Nutrition

Introducing your baby to new foods sounds fun — in theory. But when it comes time to actually do it, it can also be kind of scary — especially if you’re introducing a potential allergen, like tree nuts and peanuts.

We get it. And there’s no sugar coating it: You’re going to be nervous the first time. (And probably the second, third, and fourth time, too.)

But here’s a little bit of good news: Early introduction to allergenic food (like nuts) can actually help protect your little one from allergies. So it’s best to introduce them soon after you start feeding your baby solid foods, around 4 to 6 months.

What Are the Best Ways to Remove or Fade Stretch Marks Post-Pregnancy?

Service

Chances are, even before you became pregnant, you heard — and maybe worried — about stretch marks.

Whether it was your mom telling you (or guilting you) about the ones you “caused” or a celebrity proudly showing off theirs on Instagram, stretch marks have become nearly synonymous with pregnancy and childbirth, just like morning sickness and dirty diapers.

But as famous as they are, they’re also kind of a mystery to most of us. Why do some people get them more than others? If you got them, is it because you did something wrong? And is it true that you can fix them?

We’re here to answer all those questions.